Chords
[Intro]
D D/C G/B Gm/Bb D D/C
G/B Gm/Bb
DFolks, I'd likeD/C to singG/B song about theGm/Bb American Dream
AboutD me, about you D/C
About G/Bthe way ourGm/Bb American hearts Dbeat way down D/Cin the bottom G/Bof our chests About Gm/Bb
that specialD feeling we get D/Cin the cockles of G/Bour hearts Maybe Gm/Bb
below theD cockles, D/C
Maybe in G/Bthe sub cockle Gm/Bbarea, D Maybe in D/C
the liver, maybeG/B in the kidneys, Gm/Bb
Maybe evenD in D/Cthe colon, G/Bwe Gm/Bbdon't know
[Verse 1]
DI'm just a D/Cregular Joe,G/B with a Gm/Bbregular Djob
I'm your D/Caverage G/Bwhite, suburGm/Bbbanite Dslob
I like D/Cfootball and G/Bporno and booksGm/Bb about war
DI got an aD/Cverage house, G/Bwith a nice Gm/Bbhardwood floor
DMy wife D/Cand my G/Bjob, my Gm/Bbkids and my Dcar
My D/Cfeet on my G/Btable, and a Gm/BbCuban ciDgar D/C
G/B Gm/Bb But Dsometimes that D/Cjust ain't eG/Bnough to keep Gm/Bba man like Dme interested D/C
no G/Bway, Gm/Bb
No I Dgotta go out D/Cand have G/Bfun at someGm/Bbone else's exDpense D/C
yeah, G/Byeah, yeah, Gm/Bbyeah, yeah
I Ddrive really D/Cslow in the G/Bultra fast lane Gm/Bb
While peoDple behindD/C me areG/B going Gm/Bbinsane
[Chorus]
I'm an Dasshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
I'm Dan assD/Chole G/B Gm/Bb
[Verse 2]
I Duse public D/Ctoilets and I G/Bpiss on the Gm/Bbseat
I Dwalk around in D/Cthe summer time G/Bsaying "how Gm/Bbabout this heat?"
[Chorus]
I'm Dan assD/Chole G/B Gm/Bb
I'm an Dasshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
[Verse 3]
DSometimes I parkD/C in handiG/Bcapped spaces Gm/Bb
While Dhandicapped peopleD/C make G/Bhandicapped faces Gm/Bb
[Chorus]
I'm an Dasshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
I'm an Dasshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
[Bridge]
EmMay be I shouldn't be Asinging this song
EmRanting and raving and Acarrying on
EmMay be they're right when they Atell me I'm wrong... A
[Chorus]
DNah I'm D/C
an G/Basshole Gm/Bb
I'm an Dasshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
[Interlude]
YouD know what I'mD/C gonna do?
I'm gonna G/Bget mysel f a 1967 CadillacGm/Bb Eldorado convertible
Hot Dpink, with whale skin hubcaps D/C
And all leather cow G/Binterior
And big brown baby Gm/Bbseal eyes for head lightsD (yeah) And I'm D/C
gonna drive G/Bin that baby at Gm/Bb115 miles perD hour Gettin' 1 mile D/C
per gallon,
SuckingG/B down Quarter PounderGm/Bb cheeseburgers from McDonald'sD In the old fashioned D/C
nonbiodegradableG/B styrofoam containers And Gm/Bb
when I'm done suckingD down those greaseballD/C burgers
I'm gonna wipe G/Bmy mouth with the Gm/BbAmerican flag
And then I'm Dgonna toss the styrofoam D/Ccontainers right out the side
AndG/B there ain'tGm/Bb a goddamnD thing anybody can D/Cdo about it
YouG/B know why, Gm/Bbbecause we've gotD the bomb, that's D/Cwhy
Tw o words, G/Bnuclear fucking weapons, Gm/BbOK?
Russia, Germany, Romania,D they can have allD/C the democracy they G/Bwant
They can have Gm/Bba big democracy Dcakewalk
Right through D/Cthe middle of G/BTiananmen Square And it Gm/Bb
won't make a lickD of difference
Because D/Cwe've got the bombs, OK?
John G/BWayne's not dead, he's frozen
And Gm/Bbas soon as we find a Dcure for cancer
We're gonna thaw D/Cout the Duke and he's gonna G/Bbe pretty pissed off
You know Gm/Bbwhy
Have you everD taken a cold shower?
D/CWell multipl y that G/Bby 15 million times
Gm/BbThat's how pissed Doff the Duke's gonna D/Cbe!
I'm gonna getG/B the Duke, andGm/Bb John Cassavetes
And DLee Marvin, and SamD/C Peckinpah, and aG/B case of whiskey Gm/Bb
And drive down Dto exas and
D/CWhy don't you just shut G/Bup and sing the song, pal? Gm/Bb
[Chorus]
I'm Dan assD/Chole G/B Gm/Bb
I'm Dan asshole D/C G/B Gm/Bb
D D/C G/B Gm/Bb
[ASSHOLE]
D
[Everybody]
D/C G/B Gm/Bb D D/C G/B Gm/Bb D
[ASSHOLE]
I'm D/Can asshole G/Band I'm Gm/Bbproud of Dit D/C G/B Gm/Bb